"Life always gives us exactly the teacher we need at every moment. This includes every mosquito, every misfortune, every red light, every traffic jam, every obnoxious supervisor (or employee), every illness, every loss, every moment of joy or depression, every addiction, every piece of garbage, every breath. Every moment is the guru." -- Charlotte Joko Beck

Sunday, March 20, 2011

A fine 'welcome aboard!'

When I was assigned to my first ship as a Navy Journalist, I met with each person in my chain of command to check-in and be indoctrinated. Everyone tried hard to make me feel welcome. Everyone, that is, except the Executive Officer.

I remember Commander K_______ very well. He kept me standing at attention in his office while he flipped through my meager service record consisting of boot camp and military journalism school. Our first conversation went something like this:
“A G-D Journalist, huh?”
“Yessir.”
“What the hell am I supposed to do with a G-D Journalist?”
“Well sir, the Navy says this ship merits a Journalist billet, so here I am.”
“Don’t give me any of your lip, son! We don’t need no G-D Journalist onboard this ship! We used to have one about 18 months ago. Do you know what happened to our last Journalist, Seaman Verrico?”
“Nossir.”
“We kicked his butt out of the Navy cuz he was a G-D fruitcake! Are you a fruitcake, Seaman Verrico?”
“Nossir”
“Hmmph!  Well, let me tell you something right here and now. Don’t try to pull any of that crap you learned in school on me either. I have a degree in journalism and I know what’s right and what’s good and what isn’t!”

The message was clear. What he communicated at that first meeting was that nothing I could do would be good enough. Over the subsequent months, every project I worked on was rejected, torn apart and returned bleeding with red ink. He would not be satisfied with anything. I could do nothing to please him, so why bother to try?  But I didn’t give up and I kept trying. I never succeeded and when he transferred the following year, I was greatly relieved.

For many years I thought of him as one of the biggest jerks I ever worked for. He acted this way with everyone, so it wasn’t just me. I could not understand why he would consistently try to demotivate people. What could possibly be the purpose of such a tactic? How productive could that be?

But now that I look back on it with the experience of many years, I realize that what he did was to challenge us to prove him wrong.  I think he felt that if he kept pushing people they would keep trying harder to fight back. Those that did would do well in the Navy. Those that gave up didn’t belong there.

Interesting. I think in the long run he made us stronger.

He was still a jerk to work for, but I think his tough-love leadership style made me a better sailor and a better professional. Thanks, Commander!

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